Thursday, June 27, 2013

Salty air!

I sit in the passenger seat, checking again the reality of my situation, i'm a long way from the trail, only by the kindness of others have I gotten here, will I get a lift back?, I must go to the ocean, but man... Im so far from the trail, what am I doing, i've totally lost it, but I must go to the ocean (I convince myself once again), I need some new air to breath for a few days, so i go! Again and again I experience the good of life, I believe more than ever that people are good, the world is beautiful, the universe provides when we agree to let it do so. I sit at the ocean, eight hours away from that old dusty trail, I agreed to give myself to this experience, allowing the time to run a few days, reflect on the trail thus far, breathe some salty air. The ocean sent me loose, a lover of land adrift at sea, staring at the water, viewing the ocean life with new eyes, looking back at the rock I call home. Feeling separate, unattached to land, the way the sea warriors must have felt hundreds of years ago, brave but vulnerable. My life in constant transition through conditions, operating the present. I sit, squinting dumbly at the ocean, admiring the power of the sea. I admire the waves also, existing with their opposite, the roll and the break, I see myself in this motion. The physical in me striving for self preservation, the spirit wanting nothing more than to give and return to what is of the spirit. The balance returns to me with rocks between my toes, standing in the breeze, the ocean bringing me its tidings, I return to my breathe, the acceptance of inhale, the thanking, the returning of exhale. I have realized in my time this summer that I fall in love with that which wrecks me, that which destroys my assumptions, sending me adrift in thought. I find God in these places, I've become a seeker of these places that bring me here, floating in thought. I sat here today trying to see the world in full, looking at the giant muddy pit we were thrown into, we're all caked in it, head to toe, sharing in all of it, and its beautiful, and purposeful, necessary I would also add. The energy, the transitions, the intimate, the good, the bad and the ugly, it all exist, apart of that same wave, the wave existing with both a roll and a break, the coinciding of it all. We have mixed dimensions, we re arrange and root ourselves to each as we wish, some hold more closely to one than the other, a fluctuation of natures. We aim to fulfill the needs of each, allowing each its rightful due, seeking to feel balance amidst the opposites. I listen to the ocean, I understand it's not the visual stimulation alone in these places, the ocean looks as the ocean does, the mountains look as mountains do, this physic exist with its other, and the sounds, the energy, the breeze, the life force of this ocean, mends the deepest disconnect of my being. I leave the ocean with new light today, new eyes, a new understanding of the path I go back to, some beautiful new friends to hold dear, experience's to reflect upon and be thankful for. Thankfulness, that I have been provided for and blessed continually by that which is good. There is nothing I must say about the trail or specifics on anything in specific, I have my memories, experiences and these I will hold to, I will say that goodness is exuded from these mountains, just as it is from the ocean, and just as it is from spirits of the people I have come to love out here. I read this quote written in sharpie on a bathroom wall, it perfectly aligned. 
"No one tidies the unkempt forest floor, or trims accord the ungainly trees, the only is that of nature, a silent harmony, into which man must fit himself" - unknown

-SAGI 





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